Nothing is won by force. I choose to be gentle. If I raise my voice may it be only in praise. If I clench my fist, may it be only in prayer. If I make a demand, may it be only of myself (Max Lucado).
Helping other people change takes great insight, example, wisdom, trust in God and experience. 

Those who become drunk with alcohol lack wisdom as they mock and are noisy. He who provokes a king to anger or causes strife forfeits his life. A lazy person finds nothing during harvest if he does not plow after the autumn. A man of understanding draws out a person’s motives (Prov. 20:1-5). A discerning person draws out the motives of those who get drunk, cause strife and are lazy.

A righteous father who walks in integrity blesses his sons. No one can say that they have cleansed their heart from sin. Differing weights and measures are an abomination to the  Lord. Pure and right conduct distinguishes a young man. The Lord has made the hearing ear and seeing eye (Prov. 20:6-12). A father with integrity is a great example to his children to encourage them toward purity.  

Too much sleep leads to poverty. A buyer boasts of his good deal when he leaves. Lips of knowledge are more precious than gold and jewels. A co-signer can lose his wealth. Wealth obtained by falsehood reaps dissatisfaction. Prepare plans by consultation and make war by wise guidance (Prov. 20:13-18). Prepare and execute your plans diligently and what you say with wisdom and knowledge. 

Do not associate with a gossip since a slanderer reveals secrets. An inheritance gains hurriedly in the beginning won’t have future blessings. God will save and repay evil when you wait for the Lord. Differing weights are an abomination to the Lord. Man can’t understand his way since His steps are ordained by the Lord (Prov. 20:19-24).
Trust God’s sovereignty as you wait upon Him and take one step at a time. 

Don’t have second thoughts about a holy offering. A wise king scatters and defeats the wicked. God searches and flashes his light upon a person’s soul. Mercy maintains a king’s throne, while mercy and truth protect him. Strength is the glory of young men and experience for older men. Severe wounding cleanses away evil from the soul (Prov. 20: 25-30). Mercy and truth provide protection and experience helps you deal forthrightly with evil in peoples’ lives. 

Here are tips on how to help people change:
1. Ask God for discernment in asking the right questions to draw out the motives of others
2. Be an example of integrity to encourage people toward purity
3. Prepare what you say with wisdom and knowledge
4. Trust God’s sovereignty as you wait upon Him and take one step at a time
5. Deal forthrightly with evil in peoples’ lives without listening to gossip


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